Managing Stress While Grieving
(The following suggestions come
from Florence Miller, Health-Aid Specialist and a bereaved parent
from the Columbia, SC chapter of The Compassionate Friends.
Miller’s article appeared in our April 1997 Piedmont Chapter
monthly newsletter.)
Necessities for stress management:
Balanced nutrition
Maintenance of fluid intake
Avoidance of caffeine, alcohol and sugar in excess
Exercise
Adequate rest
Contact with a personal social network for support
Early on:
Make no final decisions now
about anything.
Ask help in guidance through daily patterns such as child care,
meal preparation, phone calls, etc.
Talk about your child and what has happened to you whenever you
can.
Force yourself to eat properly. Take a vitamin (stress)
supplement.
Exercise. Walking is the best and easiest.
Sleep more when you want to. If you can’t sleep, tire
yourself out with moderate, reasonable exercise. At least rest.
Later on:
Simplify your life for the time
being. Do only what must be done.
Eat properly.
Exercise fairly vigorously and often.
Plan times to talk about your child and your experience. Be
intentional about this.
Forgive yourself over and over — for the past, for your
feelings, for anything, real or imagined.
Be honest; let people know how you are. Friends will not know
what to say or do. Tell them what you need. They will appreciate
the guidance.
Still later:
Establish new rituals in your
family around the holidays and special occasions, even around
daily patterns.
Find a project, a cause, a charity, a task to which you can
devote your energy in memory of your child.
Love yourself.